Fun proverbs

There were a couple of funny things that I remember seeing in email years ago, but I no longer have the email messages. Google to the rescue! The first one is Chinese Proverbs, which sound like proverbs but are actually just innuendo filled silliness! Great fun.

Virginity like bubble, one prick, all gone.

Man who run in front of car get tired.

Man who run behind car get exhausted.

Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day.

Foolish man give wife grand piano, wise man give wife upright organ.

Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok.

Man with one chopstick go hungry.

Man who scratch ass should not bite fingernails.

Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.

Baseball is wrong: man with four balls cannot walk.

Panties not best thing on earth! but next to best thing on earth.

War does not determine who is right, war determine who is left.

Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cat house.

Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.

It take many nails to build crib, but one screw to fill it.

Man who drive like hell, bound to get there.

Man who stand on toilet is high on pot.

Man who live in glass house should change clothes in basement.

Man who fish in other man’s well often catch crabs.

Crowded elevator smell different to midget.

man who make love in grass get piece on earth

woman who fly plane upside down have big crack up

man who fart in church sits in own pew

man who smoke pot choke on handle

woman should never marry basketball player, he dribble before he shoots

Boy who go to bed facing stiff problem likely wake up with solution at hand.

Man who walk with hands in pockets look crazy but feel nuts.

Man who excels at putting worm on hook is Master Baiter

Secretary not permanent until she screwed on desk.

Man who loses key to lady’s apartment get no new-key.

Schoolboy who play with schoolgirl during wrong period, get caught red-handed.

Girl who get asked to go camping must beware of evil intent.

He who sneezes without a handkerchief takes matters into his own hands.

Passionate kiss just like spider web – lead to undoing of fly.

If you want pretty nurse, you got to be patient.